How fatherhood shapes humor, beyond just 'dad jokes'

S1: Welcome in San Diego , it's Jade Hindman. On today's show , comedian Mal Hall sits down and talks about Father's Day , dad jokes and his career. This is KPBS Midday Edition. Connecting our communities through conversation. Father's Day is Sunday , and we often talk about some of the more serious aspects of fatherhood this time of year. But we wanted to lighten things up today to focus on dads and humor.

S2: You guys think it's weird that you don't need any kind of certification to take a baby home ? Is that crazy ? Every other thing that we do in this country as adults , you need to get a certification. Like you want to drive. You need a license. We need to send somebody out and make sure you're cool to drive. You want to rescue a dog tomorrow. You can't just go down to the animal shelter and say , hey , I'm here to rescue an animal. No , they don't just give you a dog and send you home. There's paperwork involved , and then they send a human to your house to check it out and make sure it's cool for a dog to live there. But when you have a baby , they're just watching the clock. It's been 26 hours. Go ahead. You can take this baby. You've been a kid before , right ? Yeah. Okay. You'll be fine.

S1: That's Mal Hall in his last comedy special. The ice creams not ready. Mal is a San Diego based comedian. A dad of three kids. Mal. Welcome to midday edition.

S2: Okay. I did it one time. It was pretty. It was pretty good.

S1: It was. Okay.

S2: Okay. I survived it.

S1: I mean , okay , well , being a father plays a pretty big role in your comedy acts I see here. Um , so why do you.

S2: And for my entire career , the stories that I tell sort of mirror whatever chapter of life that I'm in. So this is the chapter I find myself in. Millennial dad , three kids under six. There's a lot of comedy in here. There's a lot of comedy available. Yes.

S1: Yes. That's true. And okay , so you must tell me about your children. There's three of them.

S2: My daughter June , three years old. And our youngest , Kaipo just turned one in May. So those those are my three. Yeah. Three bosses.

S1: I guess they are bosses at that age.

S2: Like , kind of the easiest baby of all time. And then my daughter is , you know , she's given us a run. She's giving us a run for the money. It is everything that my mom warned us about. For my son , for the firstborn. We're like , I don't know what you're talking about. This kid listens , he sleeps. He does everything we ask him to do. My daughter is like , oh , I'll do all those things that she warned you about. I'll see if I could hurt myself with this house. Oh , you said stop. I translate that to sprint towards the danger. So come get me if you can.

S1: It's like you feel like they could have a cotton ball , right ? And surely they couldn't hurt themselves with a cotton ball.

S2: She'll find a way to weaponize that cotton ball.

S1: Yeah , they'll do it. Man. Well , uh , we all know what a dad joke is , right ? Um , I think a hallmark of it is that it's corny.

S2: I don't think I'm guilty of. I'm not the dad joke guy. I enjoy laughing at a dad joke , and I enjoy , you know , people , um , the moms that make the dad jokes around me , I. I'm the comedian that , uh , I would prefer if you didn't know I was a comedian for as long as possible. And that way it's less pressure on me and the people around me to be funny. I'm not the clown , right ? Right. So you make the jokes , and I'm going to give you a full , full laugh. So you feel good that you are a funny person. Whether or not the joke was funny , it does not matter to me as long as I don't have to make you laugh for free.

S1: I totally get that. I mean , you know , like , and kids are funny , right ? Because my daughter the other day , my husband , he told a dad joke , right ? I don't even remember what the joke was because it was just that corny , but I laughed. Yeah. You know , and we were we were just laughing. And my daughter , who's five years old , she's sitting there and she goes , yeah , that just that wasn't funny for me.

S2: What else you got , dad ? Right.

S1: Like so. Matter of fact , that wasn't funny for me is what what she says.

S2: The oldest tells me I'm the best dad and he thinks I'm funny. But the bar to making kids laughed outside of your daughter apparently is very low. It's low. Any any mention of butts or farts and your full standing ovation like I'm prior in the house ? If I have a good but joke or , uh , or fart joke , all the kids seem to to love that for now. Yeah , and the one year old you just blow on his belly and he's. He thinks he's comedy genius.

S1: Well , you know , you grew up in , in rural , a rural part of San Diego. Here. Your father's black , your mom Japanese-American.

S2: Growing up with this background , especially sort of. Growing up in a very rural community is like I have a very kind of an old school outlook on on parenting and like the , the process of it all. And it is kind of clashing with sort of millennial sensibilities to what parenting is now. And , and , uh. It , it's that's where the source a lot of the comedy comes from is like just the juxtaposition of like how we were raised. Our generation of kids was raised compared to , like , how we're parenting. It's like that's where I'm finding most of the jokes is like on , you know , field trips with other parents and going like , oh , well , I was raised this way. So I'm raising my kids this way because I feel like I turned out pretty fun. But why are we oh , we're all doing it like this now.

S1: Oh , yeah. Oh , that's.

S2: Oh , yeah.

S1: It's a whole different ballgame.

S2: It's kind of , um. You have to divorce yourself from the thought of who your parents were when you were a kid. And I'm letting my mom be the the spoil the grandkids because , you know , she's earned that. But it is really hard to to be like , wait. Hold on , hold on. Wait. Why are you letting them do that ? Okay , let them do that at your house , though , because I'm. I have the rules from that you had when we were kids. Those are the rules in this house now. So you're breaking the rules. You're. You're chopping me at the legs right now , mom. Right.

S1: All this cutting the crust off the bread and everything they're doing , I'm like , I'm not doing that in my house. Yeah.

S2: I literally this is like blowing my mind because literally this past weekend I had a full like not argument , but just conversation with my mom about how we don't cut the crust off of the bread. She's like , well , I cut the crust off the bread every time they eat bread. And I'm like , well , why ? The crust is part of the bread and it's a step in making the sandwich. I don't want to do so. It's also bread costs money. You're wasting my money. Yeah. It's the crust on the bread.

S1: They don't care. They don't care.

S2: We gotta let them have it though. Yeah.

S1: Yeah. That's true. They've earned it like you said. Earned it. Well , you mentioned these generational differences in parenting and you own that. You are a millennial parent but aren't very proud of that.

S2: I wasn't at the meeting when we decided to change all the parenting rules. And so I just feel like I just feel like the change from like the parent being the authority in the house to the parent , uh , collaborating with the child is kind of hard for my brain to , to accept. You know , like , um , I just come from. I that's the that's the thing that blows my mind the most is that the , the parents that we as millennial parents ask our kids , uh , sincerely , what they want to do , what they want to eat , where they want to go. And as a generation , we feel like we're bad parents or we're abusing our kids. If we don't , then do every like , uh , uh , fulfill every answer that the three year old four year old kid requested. And it's like , I don't know. It blows my mind. It's nails on a chalkboard , and it's like , that's where the comedy comes from. So when you see my show , there's like a lot of frustration , but it's like , um , but it's just kind of it's just pointing out. I just ask why a lot like , why is this. Mhm. And there is a good percentage of millennial parents that leave my show not making eye contact with me , which , which makes me feel good to be. I made some people think tonight I like that.

S1: Oh my gosh. You'll own that too then.

S2: I. I tell people I'm trying to raise my kids. Not exactly how I was raised , but I'm taking 75 to 80% of it. The 20%. We can adjust that. You know , I think everybody I think 20% is a is a smart amount. But we're making wholesale changes to the to the principles of parenting. And it's just I don't I don't agree with it. Right. I think it's hilarious.

S1: It is , it is.

S2: What do you want for dinner ? Um , they don't know. Nutella.

S1: Nutella. Yeah.

S2: Yeah. Yeah. You want ice cream ? Ice cream with Nutella for dinner ? Coming right. Up.

S1: Up. Right. That's how it goes. Yeah , it really does. Every time I ask , cause I ask. Yeah. You know. Mhm. She doesn't give the right answer.

S2: So no it's never the meal that you spent two hours to make that they want. It's like give me the. Can you air fry something. Yeah.

S1: Yeah. Yes. Yes. So on your comedy and judging parents earlier because that's what you do. You're judging. You're judging the parents. Um. Earlier we heard a clip from your last comedy special , and you are finishing up a new one. So let's take a listen to that.

S2: So I found this out recently. I'm an on time parent. Like , you don't have to have kids to know that. You guys know these parents that feel like they have one baby and they can show up 30 minutes late to everything. They show up late to the thing , and they just point at their baby and look at you and they go , you know how. You know how it is. I always stand there confused , like , did the baby drive or what is the. You're late , dude. You're in charge. We hate you. Not that baby.

S3: Ho ho ho ho mal.

S1: That's you. I appreciate that. Joke.

S3: Joke.

S1: How dare you call me out like that ? Um. So go ahead. Can you break down for me how you take something from your everyday life ? My everyday life , for sure. And crafted into a part of your standup act.

S2: Like we'll be at the party and someone shows up late and they always Jade. You guys always come in frantic like , oh , oh my God , I'm so sorry. It's like we knew you were going to be late. And then the excuse is , oh , you get it ? Because the baby and the and the baby and it's like , I don't know , I don't I don't get it , you know , because we somehow figured out a way to get here on time. We had the three babies , but we also still retain the ability to to read a clock and respect other people's time. You know , so we found a way to get here on time.

S1: Because you don't do the gentle parenting. I don't you don't fool with that. No.

S2: No. Hey. Two minutes. We're out of here. Hey. Put your. If you want to wear shoes , you should put them on , because two minutes , the plane is taking off. We gotta go.

S1: Okay , I'm writing this down. I'm taking notes here.

S2: So our parents didn't ask us.

S1: They didn't. And.

S2: And. And we turned out fine. Look at you. You got to work on time today , day you know. Mhm.

S1: You're here.

S2: I'm here. But , but yeah. Now then we become parents and it's like well we can't come because the nap schedule falls right into the time that , that you made the plan. So do you mind. As , as a group of adults , do you mind switching all the plants ? Because my baby will not survive for the next. Who knows if they don't have their nap to do.

S1: The child is not going to act right.

S2: The child will be fine. The child adapts to our lives. We don't change our entire lives. Wholesale for the baby is my.

S1:

S2: We could crush a few bottles of wine discussing this. I feel that's where a lot of the jokes come from. It's like I just don't.

S1: Have you ever done , like , an intervention ? No.

S2:

S1:

S2:

S1: No no.

S2: No I , I will , I will tell you , I feel like I am self conscious that like , um , my friends know what my act is like now , And they have young kids. And so I feel like I don't really I try not to base a lot of the jokes off of the people that I know , because I think they will know and they'll feel a way about it. And something that I say all the time is like , there's some unspoken rules to parenting. One of them is like , you're not allowed to tell people how to do it , which is true. We're all good to do it however we want to do it , but it doesn't mean it's not funny. So I just try to I try to change the names of the of the people as much as possible in the situations , as much as possible. Because my friends are great comedy writers and they have no idea.

S1: Oh , yeah. You can't play with that one. Yeah. See ? Okay. So how did you get started in stand up ? Um , I would imagine , like , getting up in front of a crowd with the goal of making people laugh and relating to everything that you're saying can be intimidating.

S2: I've been , you know , paying , telling people I'm a comedian , paying my bills as a comedian since 2010. And I got into it just kind of by accident. Like I was trying to become a , like a sports anchor for ESPN. And so going to college for communications , I had to take an internship. So I was at a radio station in the morning. Show guy I was working with did stand up before he did radio , and I was like , I came from a small town , I don't know how to start. Like , how do you start being a comedian ? And he was like , just get a notebook and wherever they'll let you speak , you know , like write down all of your funny ideas and then find wherever they'll let you speak and find out if those ideas are funny. And I remember I remember the first time I tried , it was a five minute set that I had rehearsed for for weeks , and I did it and it was like , really ? Um , it was a rush and a high , and I've sort of never quit after that. Like I ended up dropping out of school to pursue stand up. And I got very lucky that my style and my my style and material , um , was , uh , well liked early , and I , I was able to quit all of my part time jobs three years in and like , start touring as a comedian. So I really like , if found me comedy found me.

S4: I haven't found you now I'm now I'm here now I'm.

S2: Here judging people on a on a professional basis.

S1:

S2: It's like you're watching a person that has your face , you know , figure something out for the first time. Everything. Especially when they're baby baby babies. And like your very first kid , it's like really wild as a human to watch another person , like , discover everything for the first time. And I feel like when you like , when you're especially at this stage of parenthood that I'm at right now is like , um , that's this is the whole foundation for this person is like them discovering all these new things. And how many , how many discoveries can you facilitate for your for your kids is like kind of the most fun part of it. And it kind of makes you , I don't know about you , but like , I feel like I started to appreciate little things more that we see every single day. And it's just like it's , you know , we've seen it a thousand times , so we don't register it as something interesting. But then you think about it from your kid's point of view and it's like , this is super cool. It's like there's a lot of stop and smell the roses moment with your moments with your kids , you know , and I think , like , the thing that I enjoy is like , I work , you know , for an hour at night. So I'm around during the day and I have time to like , stop and like almost rediscover roly poly. When was the last time , as an adult that you just picked up a roly poly and had to crawl up your arm ? This is like a child experience , and then you do it when you're a little kid and then you. Yeah , as an adult , we're not picking up roly polys and it's fun. It is. It's super fun. If you're listening to this right now , go in your yard. If you live in an apartment , find a strange yard. They won't mind if you play with the rolly. Pick up a rock , the rolly pulleys are under there and just let it roll around your hand a little bit.

S1: Make sure it's a roly poly.

S2: Though , right ? Yes.

S1:

S2: It's like , um , there's a real , uh , spirit of nostalgia that I , I think I bring to my show because a lot of it right now is about parenting. By the way , the new special coming out soon is called What Are We Doing Today ? That's the name of the special. But it's there's a lot about parenting in there. But you don't have to be a parent to enjoy my show. What I'm finding is , like , people will come up after the show and they go , I don't even have kids. But I enjoy the show so much , and I think it's because , like we joked about at the top of this interview , like they were kids before. I'm not only talking about being a parent , I'm talking about do you remember when we were kids , we did X , Y , Z , and I mean , I'm enjoying writing a lot of these jokes because I'm it's forcing me to reminisce and remember these sort of things that happen. And I think as adults , we get so caught up with , you know , our day to day , you know , grind that we're all in that we don't really think about. We don't connect dots on certain things from our childhood. So like when you're at a show , enjoying your two drinks and watching these comedians you've never heard of that are blowing your mind with these jokes. It's like , oh yeah , drink it from the water hose. The first 30s was , why was it that hot ? And like , it's connected to a joke that I have about my current parenting life. But that little moment , I was like , I haven't had a drink from the water hose in so long , and it just , you know. Yeah.

S1: Yeah. And it just goes on from there. Yeah. It's great.

S2: Do you. Yeah.

S1: Yeah. All right. That's cool.

S2: Everybody listening right now is like , Jay does not think that's cool. If you could see the way Jade is looking at me right now , it is. Whatever. Like the. The tone you heard in her voice is the exact way she's looking at me. Like you animal. You drink from the water hose.

S1: Not at all. No.

S2: My name is Jade. I live in a Stanley household. We have purifiers connected to our Stanley's. We would never drink from a water hose.

S1: You know. You know. Okay. This is true. It's true. It's fine. You're calling me out once again ? Uh , so you're you're headed out , right ? For Father's Day because you're gonna. Are you ? This is the comedy special that you just mentioned , correct ? Yes.

S2: So my special. What are we doing ? What are we doing today ? I just , um. We shot it last September at Lulu's at the Lafayette Hotel here in San Diego , which is , like , super cool if you haven't been there. Super sweet. Um , like 1920s jazz club and cool vibes and was able to shoot my special there. But now I'm like headlining this special around the country between gaps of like the , um , the Angela Johnson tour that I'm also on. So it's like I'm taking all the headlining shows in between all the , the , um , main support shows. And this week coming up happens to be one of them. So I'll be in Plano. Kearney , Nebraska. Denver , Colorado. Keystone , Colorado. And then Houston on Father's Day doing my our show. And then and then I turned 41 on Tuesday.

S5: All right okay.

S1: Happy birthday.

S5: To you.

S1: So much to celebrate. You got birthday father's Day. Now you mentioned the Lafayette Hotel.

S2: And it's awesome because the the community , um , the like the audiences are good. Like people go out here to have a good time. I lived in LA for almost ten years. The audience , it's a small percentage that goes out for a good time. A lot of people are going out as a thing to do , but in San Diego , people are looking to laugh. So there's a bunch of great comedy clubs. But if you want to see me specifically , I have a show at Lulu's at the Lafayette the last Wednesday. Every month. We call it Laugh at Lulu's. It's a midweek comedy showcase where I curate these lineups of comedy. I picked Wednesday on purpose because as headliners were on the road on the weekend. But a lot of my friends who headlined live in LA and it's like an easy drive down on a midweek Wednesday to come do a show in this amazing room. And so yeah , I shot my special there and I do a monthly show there and it's the last Wednesday every month. But outside of that , I would say if you're into comedy , The Comedy Store mic drop , there's a lot of very good comedy clubs in town and a lot of good independent shows in town , um , where people are really doing great work.

S1: It sounds like a lot to check out and see. I've been speaking with San Diego based comedian Mal Hall. You can find him at Mal Hall. Of course. We'll have that link on our website to KPBS. Mal , thanks so much for speaking with me today. Happy birthday. Happy Father's Day to you.

S2: Jade , thank you for having me. I look forward to having a couple of glasses of wine with you and really , really finding some common ground.

S1: Indeed , indeed. That's our show for today. I'm your host , Jade Hindman. Thanks for tuning in to Midday Edition. Be sure to have a great day on purpose , everyone.