Ben Kibler started the year on a career high.
He'd been in the Navy for 13 years and seemed to be on the fast track to promotion. He made chief after just six years and senior chief, or E-8, after 10.
As an operations specialist, he was given extra responsibilities requiring a security clearance. He'd been assigned to the amphibious assault ship USS Tripoli in San Diego, where he assumed the role of an air defense weapons coordinator — someone who, in combat, could be tasked with making real-time combat decisions.
He was selected to become an officer early in 2025, a goal he'd worked towards since joining the service in 2012.
Then, the bottom fell out.
"It's just really hard," Kibler said. "It's devastating."
On Feb. 26, the Navy informed Kibler he was going to be an officer. On Feb. 28, the Pentagon said he wasn't fit to wear a uniform.
The Department of Defense declared gender dysphoria was "incompatible" with the standards of military service.
"I've been transgender for my whole life," Kibler said. "It got to a point that I felt like I wasn't living authentically with who I am."
Ben lived as a woman — his gender assigned at birth — for his first decade in the Navy. Then, in 2020, he came out as transgender.
It took years of therapy with a Navy therapist before he medically transitioned — again through Navy medical.
"I did everything through the Navy," he said.
Kibler's performance evaluations appear at odds with the Pentagon's justification for banning transgender people.
As a petty officer 2nd class, Kibler was ranked No. 1 out of 60 sailors on his evaluation. In 2023, his commander said he was "unequivocally my best deckplate leader — my go-to senior chief."
The captain of the Tripoli wrote in his September evaluation that Kibler displayed "exceptional deckplate leadership and unwavering loyalty to mission success."
Kibler said his transition wasn't disruptive to his unit, either.
When he checked on board the Tripoli, he said his gender wasn't an issue.
"Everybody could see that I was just a member of the team and that I'm pulling my weight and that I'm trying my best the same way everybody else is," Kibler said. "And that's what's respected ... nobody really cares. We have bigger things to worry about than what gender somebody identifies as."
Last month, the Tripoli changed home port from San Diego to Sasebo, Japan. Kibler had to stay behind. He's at another San Diego Navy command waiting for the service to sign off on his voluntary separation.
Even if that separation is "voluntary," the Pentagon didn't leave anyone much of a choice.
A "voluntary" separation earns more than $100,000 in separation pay. Anyone who forces to service to kick them out involuntarily will get about half that.
"I was selected for a commission on Monday and then this (ban) came out on Wednesday," he said. "To achieve that and not really be able to relish it and you're not ever going to put it on and ... I didn't do anything wrong. It's not because of a lack of performance — I actually over-perform."
Kibler is married and now he and his wife face an uncertain future. There are job opportunities on the East Coast and some in California. But until the Navy tells him when he will be cut loose, he can't pursue another job.
He said he didn't really want another one.
"I believe in my country," Kibler said. "I love my country. I want to serve my country. So much of my identity is being a sailor. Existing without the Navy and not as a sailor is a scary thing."
He said he feels obligated to speak out because he feels his senior rank offers some protection from reprisals.
"I feel like I have a responsibility as a trans man to stand up for trans women within our community," he said. "Trans people are some of the most resilient people I've ever met. You know, to ostracize a group of people, ask them to continue to go to work, and then they still go to work and they still perform and they outperform their peers? It's awesome. And I'm so proud of all of them."
A pair of lawsuits are proceeding through the federal court system, but in the meantime, the Supreme Court ruled that the ban can proceed.
