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Teen Review: ‘Jonah Hex’

What the Hex, Jonah?

Above: Josh Brolin is "Jonah Hex"

I walked into the theater for "Jonah Hex" (opening June 18 throughout San Diego) thinking I was going to watch a movie but it felt more like I was watching a TV episode. "Jonah Hex" was too short to be labeled as a full length movie. "Jonah Hex" is to movies as Pluto is to planets -- a disgrace.

"Jonah Hex," adapted from the comic, is about a man (Josh Brolin) who is forced to watch the brutal murder of his family. Then his commander, Quentin Turnbull (John Malkovich), brands him and leaves him to die. Fortunately, a group of Indians finds him, rescues him, and gives him the ability to talk to the dead. Believing that Turnbull is dead, Hex walks the earth avenging his family’s death by helping those in need. A few years later Turnbull returns with a plan to take down the government and Jonah must stop him before it's too late.

Megan Fox and Josh Brolin in "Jonah Hex."

Warner Brothers

Above: Megan Fox and Josh Brolin in "Jonah Hex."

The plot is confusing because there is no real point to having Hex possess the ability to speak to the dead. He uses that ability one time in the movie to ask for directions but not much else. Also I don't see how Megan Fox's character, Lilah, comes into play. There is no background on how she met Jonah so you can't really tell what kind of relationship they have or why they have even ended up together. Plus what's the point of that dog chasing him around?

"Jonah Hex" did have some dry humor but overall it rated was poorly pieced together. I recommend that viewers just wait until it airs on television because it’s not even worthy enough to be rent.

--Jesus Gomez will be graduating this month from Mount Miguel High School and hopes to continue writing about movies.

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