S1: Hello , San Diego , it's Jade Hindman. Today we'll talk about healing , trauma and finding wellness in the Asian American community. This is Midday Edition , connecting our communities through conversation. In Asian American communities , there's often a stigma or sense of shame associated with pursuing therapy or other mental health treatment. For survivors of trauma , it can feel overwhelming. To start that journey towards healing. But a new book , where I Belong Healing , Trauma and Embracing Asian American Identity , looks to validate the experiences of Asian Americans by bringing personal stories and historical context to the forefront. It shows how therapy can be a tool to help address different traumas in the Asian American community. Licensed therapist Susan Lee and Linda Yoon co-authored the book. They are also co-directors of the Yellow Chair Collective , a multicultural psychotherapist group based in California and New York. They'll be celebrating the launch of the book at warwicks on January 23rd. Susan and Linda , welcome to Midday Edition. Hi.
S2: Hi. Nice to meet with you as well. Jade , this is Susan.
S3: This is Linda. Yeah.
S1: Yeah. I'm so glad to have you both. So this book was inspired by your own personal experiences and family histories. Can you both talk about your own stories and how it inspired you to write this book ? Susan , I'll start with you. Sure.
S2: Sure. Uh , so where I belong , healing Trauma Embracing Asian American Identity is a book that we actually started writing three years ago. And so it's been a while , and it's been a long journey coming in the midst of the pandemic. There was also a lot of anti-Asian hate crime that was happening. And with all of the trauma that we were witnessing on the streets and on TV , it was a rise of a need for community spaces. And so we started creating these online group spaces where people can get together as healers or just as community members , so that we can discuss about what is going on , but also try to make sense of what's been happening in the past that is reoccurring in our lives , because that's part of our history actually as Asians living in America. And so we were trying to make sense of it together and what it means now. Uh , so we wanted to make sure that there was a chance where we understand each other through storytelling , actually. And so that's part of a big portion of our book , is where we talk about the backgrounds as well as personal stories that we're experiencing in our lives. We didn't intend on writing a book , but the work that we were doing in creating these online spaces got some attention. And , uh , literally agent had approached us and saying , you know , the work that you're doing , I think should be a book. So then Linda and I just kind of considered it for a little bit and thought , you know what it should be because it would be a great resource for people. And I'll let Linda take over more about that , too. Yeah.
S3: Uh , so , Susan and I were both therapists , licensed clinicians , uh , been working more than 20 years together. More than 20 , 25 years , I believe. And we met in serving Asian immigrants and refugee communities and working with the immigrant and refugee communities and their families have been one of our passion , um , not just because it was our work , because it's also our own families. Uh , we grew up both in Korean immigrant families , and we really saw the lack of conversations or awareness around mental health or what it means to practice wellness as Asian Americans. And how would that look like ? So when pandemic hit , which was a major mental health crisis all over the world , right. And , uh , having anti-Asian hate crimes happening , that really escalated all these mental health issues that Asian Americans were facing and have been experiencing but didn't want , didn't want it to or didn't know how to because of the stigma that exists in Asian American communities. So we we were having all these clients coming to us , community members reaching out to us to make spaces , you know , to talk about this , you know , how can we start talking about mental health issues ? How can we talk about what is happening , make sense out of it , and also how to get together and , uh , being community when there's a tragedy , when there's a lot of hardships , we need community. So the book itself is kind of like an experience of being in that group. Uh , because we have a lot of stories , right ? In the group setting. We talk about our own stories , hear other people's stories , start understanding. And there are a lot of gaps in not just education , but also like awareness on like. What Asian American means , what it means to be Asian American. So there's educational portion. There's journal programs. There is people's stories. Also mental health grounding exercises. So that's how our group was when we started this online support group. That's how it was. And then it's a book form. But just going back to our own childhood to like we have been talking about how this book is something that we needed and we would have loved to see when we were growing up , because there really wasn't resources like this when we were younger and we didn't have the language , we didn't have the words. We didn't know what other people were experiencing or had similar experiences , what we were going through. So yeah , so we hope that this will be a great resource for the Asian American community and beyond.
S1:
S2: As Linda mentioned , we've been working in the field for a while , and so individually , I think we were used to hearing these stories and kind of putting the pieces together in our minds already. But our community members didn't know each other. Part of the huge stigma around talking about mental health is that it's a very secretive , almost experience for people , especially in the Asian American community. And so there weren't a lot of spaces where people were gathering to talk about each other's mental health processes , but it really made it possible. I think that online space made it possible for people from all over the country to get together in saying , you know what ? I've been experiencing this too , and my story kind of looks like this. And other people are to be able to say , you know what ? I feel the same too. I didn't know that other people felt that way as well. Hmm.
S4: Hmm. And , you.
S1: Know , as you both alluded to , many Asian American communities are shaped by trauma that previous generations faced , and that includes trauma from war , displacement and migration. So , Susan , how does this historical backdrop help us understand the mental health of Asian Americans today ? Yeah.
S4:
S2: So in our Asian and Asian American mental health spaces , this term , intergenerational trauma has been I would , I want to say newly discussed in in the community setting. And that background comes from exactly what you mentioned is the historical element is how our previous generations have been placed in a different situations , such as war and displacement from their homes and the trauma that they carry with them along that journey. And then that gets passed down to the next generation and to the following generation and to the following generation. Right. And so it really does not matter if you are a first generation , or you might be a fourth generation identifying as Asian or Asian American living in the States. It's the experience of our ancestors that have been displaced and what they carried with them , and the way in which historically , those elements have been discouraged to be talked about. Because I think that's the part where we are left out in questioning when it comes to discovering our identities , is part of adapting and acculturation. Um told us that in order for us to become good citizens of America , or whatever definitions that they had to put on themselves to be Americans , that we had to avoid our history. And so trying to bring back the understanding of our family history is an important part of this healing journey. Absolutely.
S1: Absolutely. And you mentioned the spike in anti-Asian hate and bias that brought a lot of this trauma to the forefront.
S2: They have left that part of their lives. Like I said , part of it is survival is that they just told themselves , you know , we're not going to talk about what's happened in the past. And part of that was survival. And so we left that part behind. And now imagine you have raised your family , you have adult children and you're older and all of a sudden you see and witness your friends being. Attacked.
S5: Attacked.
S2: And you witness on TV and news talking about people that look just like me , being reflected with violence and hatred and seen as a disease even.
S4: And Linda.
S1:
S6:
S3: Want to add , there's a long history of Asian American immigration in America. And a lot of times that are not studied and people don't know about it. Right. And there has been this sense of perpetual foreigner , no matter what , how many generations Asian Americans might have lived here , or they may not even have identity back in their home countries of their ancestors. Perhaps that they were not seen. Asians were not generally seen as Americans , just kind of foreigner. And the narrative that was coming out in anti-Asian hate crimes were just reinforcing that narrative that you don't belong here. This is not your home. And it was coming out really making us go back to this history of all this Asian hate that did exist in American history , that we have somehow thought that it wasn't there. And there was actually a lot of people in the beginning didn't believe this hate crimes were happening , that there are racism against Asian Americans. I've been very surprised how violent this act has become. Yeah.
S4: Yeah.
S1: I mean , you know , and the relationship between trauma and the physical body is a relatively new concept in Western medicine , in practice , as you point out in the book.
S2: There's a whole chapter on it , but ongoing part of the trauma healing process , we believe has to involve the body. And so a lot of our grounding exercises are in all of the chapters because of that as well. But going back to your question about the relationship. And so when a trauma occurs , we believe that even if there is no actual memory , active memory , that we are able to go back to those moments through our bodily reactions. And so that's what we call a trigger. I think a lot of the times in our culture , we use that word a lot as well in saying , I feel really triggered , and sometimes we don't know what it is that has triggered us or what is happening to our body , that it's behaving in this way. But there's the four F's that we talk about in our book , and I'll introduce you very briefly to those. And those are fight , flight and freeze and fawning responses that our body may have in reaction to a triggering event. And so when we go through these kind of reactions where our body might say , I'm ready to fight the situation or I'm ready to flee the situation , one of the things that I just mentioned about the four F's there is that finding peace that many Asian and Asian Americans may actually have learned to adapt to as part of the bodily response for trauma. And fanning may look like anxiousness , feelings of guilt , or the inability to establish or assert boundaries. And that's one of the things that a lot of people have trouble with , whether that's in a family situation or workplace situations where it's triggering for them.
S1: And Linda , in the book , you recognize that the Asian American experience is not monolithic.
S3: And we just cannot assume , um , how one Asian American experience will be like. And I think that's what people found out a lot of times through Asian American support groups that we have been running , that there is so much diversity and so much stories , so much identities that represent Asian Americans. And to give a little historical example , uh , Asian American term was coined by activist right around the civil rights movement was happening. There was an identity , Asian American identity at the time. So a lot of times we were identified as Chinese Hindus at the time or Korean Filipino. There wasn't really collective identity and we were being overlooked. So activists got in and wanted to coin the term that will bring all the immigrants of Asian ancestry together. And it became a term like a political and collective term to give this identity. And who is represented , uh , can be hard for some people because a lot of times it has evolved as well. Who's included in this term as have evolved over the years. So we talk a lot about , uh , client exploring , like , what is it mean for you to be Asian , uh , or Asian American ? And how does it play in your individual lives and your community and family lives ? So those are the things that we question. We , um , sit with and figure out , explore. And it's always evolving. And we just let clients kind of find their own journey with their families , with their community , what that means.
S1: Coming up , the conversation continues with breaking down the stigma around mental health.
S2: Now the next generation , like children of immigrants or second or third generations , are saying , you know what ? We want to come back and we want to integrate all elements of wellness into our lives. And that includes mental health.
S1: You're listening to Kpbs Midday Edition. You're listening to Kpbs Midday Edition. I'm Jade Hindman , I'm speaking with therapist Susan Lee and Linda Yoon about their new book , where I Belong Healing , Trauma and Embracing Asian American Identity. So we've talked about intergenerational trauma , and there are some people who are hoping to get their parents into therapy , but that can be a sensitive and difficult conversation , though , to to really have when there's stigma around mental health in your family. So , Susan , do you have any advice for those who might want to approach their parents about going to therapy ? Yes.
S2: I am so glad that you asked , because this is a question that we get very often , actually , because it tends to be the children of immigrants , the adult children of immigrants that are reaching out to us for services. And oftentimes they may begin the journey of finding themselves , their identity and doing this intergenerational work and then begin to realize , of course , well , I want my mom to have these kind of conversations. I would love for my mom or my parents to be able to go through this journey of understanding where they come from as well , and how that's impacted and inform the way that they're living their lives now. Right. Whether that is in a limited way or whether that's been expansive , both ends. Uh , so one of the things that I like to talk about is what therapy truly means. And for a Western sense , therapy looks like. And the way that we might approach therapy looks like this one on one , uh , sitting down with a professional and being able to talk about our experiences. Right. There's a lot of talking involved for a lot of first generation immigrants and refugees talking , sitting down with a person that is especially , perhaps younger than them. And to talk about their history and their lives may not land very well. It might very well go against all of their lived values. Actually. And so to try to force them into doing that might not exactly be the answer. Uh , and so what we what we say is , how can we approach therapy in a wider lens where we can create activities or conversations within family members that feels therapeutic to them ? And so that might look like , let's say , for a lot of our , um , immigrant parents playing mahjong together and learning even how to play mahjong and teaching that to their children might be a beginning conversation around the joy and the culture and the history that they come from. Or a lot , um , or a very big , uh , topic has been around passing down recipes as well , or cooking together. Right ? These are more gentle ways that we can approach the topic of mental health and community building. Um.
S1: You know , self-compassion is a big emphasis in the book.
S3: I in my own journey , I felt like when I started practicing self-compassion , that's when I felt major transformation , uh , from my trauma and the narratives that I have endured. Uh , being an immigrant , being an Asian oldest daughter , there's a lot of different narratives that can come with it. And there's that sacrifice that a lot of children of immigrants or refugees carry. Uh , seeing our parents sacrifices , seeing what parents gave up for us , for us to have a better , better education or for us to be able to take care of them later. Only speaking from my own experience , I definitely had that expectation to be excellent , to be perfect even they may not have said it. Uh , that was a big expectation for me to succeed and do well , and that experiences gave me a lot of narratives that I cannot be compassionate to myself. I have to be harsh when I make mistakes , when I'm not performing , when I'm not doing well because I'm not living up to not just my parents expectation , but also like what they gave up for me , uh , for my family to be here to give us better opportunities. Uh , so that's common stories that we do hear a lot , um , especially also from children of refugees where their parents went through war , displacement like , and they know how much tragedy they went through. And if they feel like they're having a hard time in America , is it even valid to.
S7: How do struggles.
S3: When their parents went through such a hardship , right ? So self-compassion has been hard topic for many , many clients that we have worked with for those reasons.
S1:
S2: Uh.
S4: Uh.
S2: These are questions that a lot of people are asking us as well , because there's this whole movement. And Linda and I love saying this. Whenever we are gathered together now with other activists and community members that are doing the work to destigmatize mental health , we continue to say we're part of this new movement that didn't exist before. And whereas the previous generation might have been avoiding the topic of mental and emotional well-being for very good reasons , right ? It was out of their survival that they did. Now the next generation , like children of immigrants or second third generations are saying , you know what ? We want to come back and we want to integrate all elements of wellness into our lives , and that includes mental health.
S1:
S3: Talk about mental health. Let's not hide it. Let's not pretend it's not existing. Because statistics also show that Asian Americans suffer a lot of different struggles , pain and mental health illness too. So that has been really great. You know , Susan and I have been being involved in more communities , more places , younger generation especially. They they are so educated , uh , eager to be educated and eager to start those conversations with their families as well. So the conversation definitely , we have seen a lot more after pandemic , after unfortunately , tragedy did hit in our communities. You know , tragedies like which those things never happen , but they do bring the community together and help communities to build together as well. And it really shows the the resilience , persistence and strength of the community.
S1: I've been speaking with Susan Lee and Linda Youn , authors of the book where I Belong Healing , Trauma , and Embracing Asian American Identity. They will be appearing at a book event at Warwick's on January 23rd. Susan and Linda , thank you so much for joining us. What a great conversation.
S2: Thank you so much for having us. I hope to see you all at Warwick's.
S3: Thank you for having us.
S1: That's our show for today. Thanks for joining us. Don't forget to watch Evening Edition tonight at five for in-depth reporting on San Diego issues. We'll be back tomorrow at noon. And if you ever miss a show , you can find the Midday Edition podcast on all platforms. I'm Jade Hindman. Have a great day , everyone.
