Sex And The Transplant City

[00:00:02.130] Welcome to the Parker Edison Project. In this episode, we talk about the culture of Sex in the City, where the sun always shines and we're dating season this year round, we're not snowed in. We don't hibernate like they do in cool places. We don't find like our one person to, like, build our little nest and hibernate with because it's cold. You can't go out. We are the place for sexy getaways for just like I'm in town. [00:00:30.390] Who's hanging out in a time where Tinder is the new speed dating. We talk about the lascivious history of the San Diego dating scene and how the military and LGBTQ communities influence the culture. [00:00:42.510] We all know San Diegos gaslamp is kind of high end party town. Back then it was pretty seedy. There was peep shows, arcades, tripleXXX film theaters [00:00:54.390] and we talked to underground rap legend to mix about love songs and heartbreak. [00:00:59.080] You know, I've missed out on a wife or two. Oh, you know what I mean? [00:01:02.250] I've already messed up in Lost. [00:01:04.350] It's going to be a good time. You should definitely swipe right. [00:01:23.300] - 2mex Let me let me let me let me let me leave you, let me love you later. But later is a letter that a little lady for falling in love with the feeling of falling can leave you in and out of favor and do me a favor and never fall in love again. Maybe we can make a movie. Maybe we can make a baby. Maybe we could just make it. You being so jaded is making that kind of hard. Even if you never, ever let me know that I will never, ever leave you for leaving, you would leave me alone. You will have a lot. [00:01:53.640] You are now listening to the Parker Edison Project. [00:01:57.350] Good morning. Welcome to the Parker Edison Project, where we examine tenets of American culture and what really makes America great this episode. Well, it's something complex. It's different. It's really different. Every meeting we ever create, we find a way to use it for adult entertainment. And no place has pushed us further and faster than the West Coast. We have a long history in sexy entertainment. This is one of the reasons we're the perfect place for tourism in the tinder. [00:02:25.100] - MissLolly Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Parker, you're not starting your show right now, are you? [00:02:29.060] I mean, I got to I got to do the show. [00:02:31.560] Yeah, but we were in the middle of a conversation. You can't just, like, leave the conversation, start your show. I mean. [00:02:35.840] Yeah, [00:02:37.790] - MissLolly no, we were talking about this. We had a bet going. It was, you know, a heated conversation. And then you just decided to start your show that. [00:02:46.310] Now, ladies and gentlemen, this is my very good friend, Miss Lolly. She and I've been having a discussion on dating season, and I said Atlanta's is way bigger than California and if I'm wrong, I'll let you host the whole show. [00:02:58.670] - MissLolly No, it's absolutely the West Coast. We got L.A., San Diego, San Francisco. We have Hollywood. [00:03:05.120] - P Hey, Dave. Hey, can you look it up for me real quick? [00:03:08.510] - dave the worlds greatest soundguy Yeah, I'm on Google. And this article from last year says, San Diego, L.A. and the Bay are in the top ten biggest dating scenes. Atlanta's only there once. So she's right. Were. Yep, so who hosts this episode? No. [00:03:31.790] - MissLolly Hi, this is sex and stuff with Miss Lolly, I am your host, Miss Lolly and with me today. I have my co-host Parker. Today's topic is the sexy history of San Diego. So we have been talking about this for a while. Parker, can you tell our listeners what your theory is? [00:03:49.690] - P They're not our listeners. They're my listeners. [00:03:51.560] - MissLolly No, no. Today they are our listeners. You lost the bet. [00:03:57.140] - P We have three things that have helped shape San Diego into being the perfect haven for romance, the three influences, in my opinion, are the soldiers who have constantly been on shore leave the transplants because we get everybody's best and brightest and also the weather. That's my theory. That's my theory. [00:04:14.150] - MissLolly OK, so can you elaborate a little bit more on the military angle? [00:04:17.540] - P Yeah. I mean, you know, because you're from here, but some on a little fact, no immigrants fled the anti Chinese violence in the Northern California area. I started working down here at our ports, our fishing boats. So by proximity, San Diego was always getting in on that action that the remnants of that that we still have are places like the China Doll Coffee Shop near Pacific Highway and historically, they hired Asian waitresses and hostesses hoping to hook military money with like these kind of subtle references to exotic foreign ports. And I wasn't I wasn't privy to that when I was growing up because I was bouncing back and forth in San Diego. But my homeboy Bob was so cool. I called him up real fast. Yeah, yeah. [00:05:02.180] - P OK, OK. Bob, yo, what's good with you, man? [00:05:11.900] - Bob Surratt AKA Stuntdouble I'm good. What's cracking? I'm doing an episode about Sex and the City of San Diego's got this big, lascivious history. And I know that, you know, everything that so far can do me a favor and just introduce yourself for my listeners. [00:05:25.610] - Bob Surratt AKA Stuntdouble Yeah. My name is Bob Surratt. I'm a librarian. I'm going to see you in San Diego. I call my stunt double, oftentimes with my partner in crime tension. And I make songs about San Diego. [00:05:39.410] - P And one of the reasons I'm reaching out to you, because you're just one of the all real smart cats that I know. Even within your raps, there's this tendency to give San Diego's history like an unofficial street historian of my opinion. [00:05:52.160] - Bob Surratt AKA Stuntdouble You're too kind. Sure. I'm all about San Diego. I live and breathe San Diego. You know, it works its way into a lot of my subject matter. I've done a few records that I spoke to San Diego and kind of the changing conditions of San Diego. I see that. I see that your music almost has like the collegiate factor to it. [00:06:14.380] - Bob Surratt AKA Stuntdouble Yeah, for sure. When I released The Hunchback Golden Hill, there's a song called Trump, which speaks to the way that San Diego has kind of pivoted from, say, war and that aspect of the military life and into technology. People call the. And you kind of became like a hub for drone technology, and as we all know, drones are kind of the forefront of modern warfare. [00:06:46.770] - P That's a normal business, but it has retained its results and repercussions from it. Here's the reason I was calling. You had these two things. One is because I dug drone. I thought that was a great piece of the San Diego history in there. One of the other things that you were telling me, this story about that movie..Tell me about that [00:07:06.910] - Bob Surratt AKA Stuntdouble 1979 film called Hard Core Film, starring George C. Scott, written and directed by a guy named Paul Schrader. I believe it's about this Midwestern Christian businessman whose daughter goes missing a movie which will take you into a world never dealt with. In a major motion picture, a father searches for his missing daughter only to find she has been used in a sordid and shocking way. And he hires a private detective to search for her. He eventually finds her in a porn film. George Scott's character is kind of, you know, traversing the sex underworld of Southern California. And some of the bureau footage that they used is San Diego in the late 70s, specifically downtown San Diego. It was pretty sketchy. You know, there was peep shows, arcades, triple X film theaters. That was kind of what was cracking that. And bars, obviously, you know, we all know San Diego is gaslamp with this kind of high end party town. But back then, it was pretty funny. [00:08:15.070] - P The series on Showtime, 'The Deuce' , is depicting that era of New York and San Diego. Compare all the downtown was just littered in just a string of theaters, peep shows. And there were also, you know, ladies of the night. Oh, I think we're golden. I think we're good. Let me get back to the show from Holler at you. [00:08:35.800] - Bob Surratt AKA Stuntdouble All right, fellas, thank you so much. [00:08:40.820] - P There's a lot of people, they think the San Diego's Barrio Logan is getting gentrified, and it is, but that's also a long process. National city is full of Navy ports and also historically full of strip clubs and bars. And that's because when we cleaned up downtown sailor scene, we moved it to National City. So now they're getting rid of the strip clubs and bars over there, but getting rid of the peep shows, new 30 second streets, Navy base, also the tattoo parlors. No one ever talks about that, but tattoos were a big, big sailor thing. Now they're not so much sailors in the Navy is discouraging them, but people have really grasped onto them out here on the West Coast. So fashion wise, that's another way. The military is like, I made an impression on us. [00:09:26.120] - MissLolly That makes sense. Yeah. [00:09:27.410] - MissLolly I mean, these days, you know, you have to kind of stay on dating apps like I don't have tattoos instead of I do have tattoos, you know what I mean? Super true. Super true. So what's next? [00:09:41.450] - P Oh, we're talking about the theory of transplants. You remember that? Yeah. [00:09:45.980] - MissLolly People come here and they stay here all the time. In my opinion, we either got the prettiest people or they're coming to visit like we get other cities best and brightest and they come here. Yeah. [00:09:55.520] - MissLolly I've heard girls say that a lot of, you know, like back home, I'm a 10, but L.A., San Diego mystic, I kind of feel like we've skipped over a big section here. [00:10:04.980] - MissLolly We've been talking about this in a pretty cis hetero normative kind of way and we have overlooked the LGBTQ community in San Diego. It's huge. And if you're going to talk sex in San Diego, you have to mention that. [00:10:16.700] - P True. True. [00:10:18.690] - MissLolly Actually, the first time I came down here looking for apartments, my mom and I got on university and we saw like a bunch of people half naked dancing around and I'm like, what's going on? And my mom looks at me, goes, Oh, honey, we're behind a gay pride parade. I'm like, oh, I'm like, I want to live right there. This is the beginning of the gay pride parade. This is the apartment we should get. So I ended up getting an apartment right there and it was right next to PECS. [00:10:45.290] - MissLolly Have you heard of PECS? I know a little bit of off university in San Diego near near what's known as like the the Hillcrest area. [00:10:53.330] - MissLolly Yeah, that place what I found out is mostly male gay bar. I felt really comfortable there. They were really welcoming and it wasn't like, hey, what are you doing? But there are places you don't go there if you're not part of their community and you just have to respect that. Like the eagle was the eagle, the eagle, where they're more like leather daddies. Like unless you are a part of their scene, you don't go there. You don't want to disrespect by saying, oh, what's going on in here? I just want to look and see. Everything I've heard is the horns like a really fun place to be had. [00:11:27.620] - P Some fuzzy gay men are known as bears. It turns out the San Diego is a huge jump off point for bear culture. One of the biggest podcasts in the country is six one nine bear cast recorded right here in San Diego. There's also the magazine, A Bear's Life. They have like leather daddy contests. [00:11:44.510] - MissLolly And it looks really cool. It does. They've been having the leather daddy competition since 1995. [00:11:51.200] - P And it's apparently a really big deal. It is a big deal. It is a big deal. [00:11:56.000] - P And now I'm starting to kind of see your point where the weather plays a part in that, like the nightlife can go longer because there's no snow. All the warm nights make it more conducive for people to party out here starting point. [00:12:08.750] - MissLolly And we don't hibernate like they do in cool places. We don't find like our one person to, like, build our little nest and hibernate with because it's cold. You can't go out. Super true. [00:12:20.900] - P It's always dating season out here. That's interesting. [00:12:24.260] - MissLolly We're not snowed in. We're not snowed in with our one person. You know, we're we're still out there dating well into the winter. No one knows how to, like, just buckle down for for a month or two. [00:12:34.250] - P Yeah. Maybe that makes us kind of immature in a way. We're having lots of fun, but maybe we're just like perpetually immature. A group of people just dating like we're in our twenties forever. [00:12:45.200] - MissLolly The other thing then is San Diego is just full of just super young, sexy people. Well, it doesn't just stop when you hit a certain age, right? [00:12:53.300] - MissLolly We do have an older community here, too, because, like you said, the weather, you know, like older people go to warmer climates and they're still dating and they're still doing stuff and they're still having fun in that way. And I don't believe you. They do. Oh, no. Yeah. Yeah. Well, we can call my aunt. She's been a sex therapist for like what, twenty, thirty years. She's kind of an authority. I mean, she's been like she was the all-American sex kitten in the seventies. All right. Tell you what, we go to commercial real fast. Imma set up a Zoom call with your Aunt Diana, Doctor Diana, Dr. Diana, don't go nowhere. [00:13:35.820] - P we'll be right back with sex and stuff with Mrs Lolly, hate this. [00:13:45.590] - P Welcome back. We've been talking Sex and the City, we're just about to call Dr. Diana for some professional insight, hold tight. [00:13:54.980] - Dr Diana Wiley And there, Parker. Hi, it's nice to be with you. I see you're on the line with my lovely niece, Lolly. [00:14:04.730] - MissLolly Hi, Diana. I called you to help us out with this conversation. [00:14:08.390] - Dr Diana Wiley First off, is it really true that you were at the inauguration? Clintons? [00:14:12.770] - Dr Diana Wiley We're friends. We go back to nineteen sixty nine, Bill Clinton. And he was a Rhodes scholar then. And I was in London for the summer and I met him then and we dated and stayed in touch. So I went to two or three of his inaugurations in Arkansas and then I went to his first inauguration for president. And we're still friends. We're still friends. [00:14:33.050] - MissLolly So and I am of that kind of that kind of brings us to what Parker and I were talking about. Culture has changed so much in how we interact with each other that, you know, it's changed how we're having sex, too. But I was wondering if insight on that. [00:14:48.620] - Dr Diana Wiley I think that younger people may be a little more conservative and maybe a little less eager to jump into bed and to commit to a long term relationship, because many younger people have seen their own parents divorce and so they're more cautious about commitment. [00:15:05.970] - P That's an awesome point that you're bringing up. And I just want to ask if you think that makes all of our strapping young military men more likely to be promiscuous. Don't forget the military women. I wonder what the difference is there? [00:15:18.260] - Dr Diana Wiley In the past, there would be a mutual understanding that when they work together, they have an open marriage and maybe have sex with somebody else. But there is also a lot of just cheating where they don't have that arrangement. The the arrangement is we agreed to have a non monogamous relationship or marriage in the old days. You wrote letters. I mean, I think it's too bad in a way. We don't write letters as much. Your Valentine cards, of course, love notes. [00:15:48.200] - Dr Diana Wiley So you get to know each other better that way and you anticipate the return of your mate. That actually plays into my marriage in a way, because I do this arrangement with my husband and that's living apart together. We're highly committed, but we also want personal space and independence. I don't know if this is San Diego specific or there's something about San Diego. Most people I've talked to recently who don't have children enjoy having a less traditional relationship of varying degrees, you know, living together, not living together. [00:16:27.920] - MissLolly The idea of living together is mostly driven by we can't afford not to or we're trying to raise kids once you get rid of that component. Relationships are kind of free to be whatever you and your partner or partners decide that you want them to be. It's a growing trend distance and the compressed time together creates anticipation. So this L.A. has some similarities to military wives and husbands because they're separated by virtue of the fact that they're out. In a way, yes. [00:17:06.920] - P Wait, before you go, let me ask you, because I was I was page into your book and I caught this piece about the seven second kiss. Can you just really tell my listeners? [00:17:16.970] - Dr Diana Wiley In my book, Love in the Time of Corona are a number of exercises that I have been using with my couples in my private practice. Now only a resume, but in the past in person, of course, I have a number of exercises. [00:17:28.760] - Dr Diana Wiley And one is when you see your partner at the end of the day, if you give your partner a seven second kiss and a 50 second drug, that is long enough to get the oxytocin going, the more your touch, the more you want to be touched. And it's a positive feedback loop. It's a good thing. [00:17:44.020] - P Oh, my gosh. Dr. Diane, I think we got what we need. I really do. OK, lovely to meet you, partner. Bye bye. I love you. [00:17:53.810] That was awesome. I told you, she's great. She is. She's so look, I would love to do your job for you, but I actually have my own job. So I'm going to go back to doing what I was doing. [00:18:05.360] - MissLolly And I'll let you finish this yourself. You can have your show back. Thanks for being a good sport. And you lost a bet and you gave me your show. [00:18:14.840] - MissLolly That was it was really nice. I didn't have a choice. I know. I know nothing. Thank you. Thanks a lot, miss. Like. [00:18:33.860] - 2mex I have one more person I had to talk to about this topic of love on the West Coast. He's an L.A. underground rapper with too many tales to come, in my opinion. He's an expert on love. [00:18:44.400] It's another it's another exclusive another exclusive for for for my listeners. [00:18:53.580] - P Who are you and what city are we in? [00:18:56.040] - 2mex My name's Alex. They call me 2mex the L.A. underground hip hop artists. And we're currently in Long Beach, California. I'm from Mid City, but I've been in Long Beach for a couple of years now. [00:19:05.700] - P Thank you so much for having us here today. [00:19:07.410] - 2mex Yeah, no, that's a pleasure. I like what you guys are doing right off the bat. [00:19:11.690] - P This whole episode is about love, sex. What part does romance play in your songs and in your work? [00:19:19.650] - 2mex I find it most times playing a dominating role because it dominates our thoughts as men, you know, I mean, whether you're married or not, married or single or not single, I mean, that's the man woman dynamic is that for me personally, it's the dominating force of my life. So, you know, I love women and, you know, I've always been fascinated with wanting to find a partner and build in. And I mean, it gets it and get to that point. [00:19:45.720] - P Let me ask you this. How many albums are in your catalog today? [00:19:51.630] - 2mex And I know its going to sound weird, but I believe if you count all my different band albums, I believe I have twenty seven records as of today. Does your does your rap lifestyle hinder your love life? It used to. I mean now you know, now I'm more grounded but yeah for sure. I mean, you know, I've had women that, that I wanted to really date and have relationships with and they'll be like, no, I don't like this. Like, I don't like going to a show with you. And there's 10 other women trying to take pictures with, you know what I mean, just natural. Or they don't think that the music is they're just like, that's not my life. [00:20:27.750] - P Right. [00:20:28.110] - 2mex And I can respect I could respect somebody for that. And there's such a theme of love in your recordings. I mean, when you have that connection, it's it can be so intense. I've always been I don't have any kids. I'm not married. So I've always been very kind of a commitment phobe. [00:20:42.720] - P Do you write the most when you're in love, when you're falling in love or when you're out of the relationship? [00:20:48.450] - 2mex Good question. At this point, the way that I write kind of prolifically, it doesn't matter almost. So it just, you know, in love, out of love, out of my mind, love. I love you from inside of my mind. Love that kind. Love that kind of love that cats get in line to love the cure. I love cats kind of love. I could watch a movie and see the relationship instead of a movie of two people that they're obviously just acting like a fictitiously. Create a song. I kept it with me. But it's not to imagine you love someone, but they're out of town or you love someone, but they love someone else. [00:21:22.550] - P in hindsight, did you break more hearts than you've had your heart broken? [00:21:25.650] - 2mex Hmm. Yeah, yeah, I think so, because when I was young, I was a nice guy. No, getting my heart broken, being a recording artist and having this kind of fame, this fake temporary adulation. Yeah, I went from zero to one hundred, so I went from barely dating people at all and then clicking in to being kind of underground rap famous I think as a man who was not married or and not having kids and went through that for a long period of time. And so I realized that maybe that's not the life you want to live. Oh, you know what I mean? I've already messed up and lost. There's some quality women out there that are whether they're friends with me or not, some of them are not friends of me anymore, but some of them are. But, man, there's a couple of quality women out there that I that I passed up on and I will never have that opportunity again, you know. [00:22:13.160] - P Whoa, you said that. You said this thing. You're like yo and his underground rap fame. And I'm like, let me let me put some context to that, because one of the things I'm super a fan of is the movie Whip It. [00:22:25.290] - 2mex Yeah. That I have a song on there on in the movie once again. Whip it. [00:22:30.150] - P Oh yeah. So when you talking about underground fame its an underground as in Drew Barrymore, Juliette Lewis movies underground. [00:22:37.620] - 2mex I've had my moments. I mean, Visionaries was lucky enough to put a song in the movie Ocean's Twelve. I got I got a song on The Twilight Zone and there's a new visionary album, a new visionary's album out right now. It's called Vee. Yeah, we're blessed. Jazzy Jeff blessed us with the interlude and the intros by Harry Allen. He does a two and a half minute synopsis on the group. It's amazing. Both like the highlight of my life. [00:23:03.000] - 2mex Speaking of new music, you got a single out right now and it's produced by. Will, I Am. [00:23:08.970] - 2mex Yeah, yeah, yeah. And Features Will on the record. What's the name of it. It's called Lay on the Ground. And yeah, I was blessed by Will I Am from Black Eyed Peas. I asked him to do a verse and he ended up redoing the whole song, producing it, dropping two verses, chopping my verse up and I mean made it. Like a duet, you know, I mean, Will I am's brilliant and so, you know, he blessed me with a with a song, you know, I've known well since I was in high school. I went to high school. Well, you know, we always talked about randomly doing something. And he just totally laces me on New Year's, you know, as the as New Year's was clicking over this year, like eleven o'clock, 12 o'clock. Yeah. He was hitting me up like, you know, I'm like, dude, aren't you Will I am like, you got some more cracking to do on New Year's. I'm very grateful, man. And he's going to hopefully produce some more stuff, you know, keep moving. [00:23:58.820] - P Can you do me a favor and just tell people your name and introduce the song for me. [00:24:02.360] - 2mex Yeah, my name is to 2Mex and this is a song called 'LA Underground" and features. Will I am and it's a dope song. Check it out. [00:24:18.480] And it was all a dream, the source magazine, I know that the limousine liberal church boy always in wrestling. Little did I know what people who go to the buildings you see happen to my body competing with somebody daily. I never looked at me like that, but still my quest de la soul to many things in life that we can control, that we love, which I'm treated like gold, because every time you have a bank can prove to me you can buy forever like a tramp stamp and you're looking for something, just a tick tock. [00:24:52.830] But I have something to give me. Something you could walk, say that little kid Wewak big talk. This is not real. L.A. underground hip hop. This is that real on the hop, right? This is the real underground hip hop. This is the real the background here. This is that will never the ground here in Hollywood to Inglewood. We talk about Danny Boyle Heights to cop to we talk about some of those nice some scandalous wiggling ins in Los Angeles, L.A. We were throwing up that and. [00:25:41.090] Offering the city that's pretty good. West Coast are down when you're going to Bob Boyle Heights for the underground, now it on a flight, out of space, out of sight. Sputnik satellite came up from the block. Now I'm like an astronaut at Cosmo coming out from I was making sense, but now I'm making a big to catch you guys and not as some gadget. I'm dodging it all. You had the class. I'm going to graduate. [00:26:10.630] How does it affect the city? What we say is because we live with the Babuji from the city where we got no bees with the choppers, but I made it to the tip top came from the underground hip hop. [00:26:29.120] This is the real on the ground here. This is a real on the ground here. This is not real on the ground here. This is that we on the ground here in Hollywood to Inglewood, before we talk about Danny Boyle Heights, to cop to me, talk about some of us. Nice, some scandalous woman missing in a Los Angeles, L.A.. We were throwing up that in w a snoop and kinky freestyle fellowship from solidness, the brand new begins and the leaders of the new school on the West Coast. [00:27:15.240] We got love with the East Coast to you, the facts. So no punches to the song with one x two next time to flex to take them to protect their neck. Everybody say will keep the first one that names five on the ground and the game still trying to doubt me. You can make a difference without me. Two men from Mexico sent me to California. Phil, fill the gap. You're my, my, my mike. Come on. [00:27:43.710] You know, equal offering that take because, you know, object me go off. That's the got grounds. Like I'm Riegle is one that makes me like Magneto for the project with no transport. I got a whole bunch of stamps in my passport world, my kids that wanted to be a gangster to fall in love with gang star. If you step on 20, 20 and you should thank God everybody needs a little up on the red card. I want to thank your give. [00:28:09.360] Thanks for the haters because it wasn't hating. I want to aim for that was my motivation to switch my stand off spit on every boulevard issue like of God. You started as a backpack rapper. Now I got a briefcase. Oh yeah. I still baby sit on a table. Let me let the beat break. This is the real underground hip hop. This is the real underground hip hop, hop, hop, thanks for stopping it. Parker Edison Project is produced and hosted by yours truly Parker Edison and the Good People at Platform Collection. [00:28:47.480] Be sure to subscribe and catch the next episode on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your podcasts if you have any comments or questions. [00:28:56.120] Visit the Parker Edison Project Dotcom or hit us on Instagram at the P project. [00:29:01.610] My guy, Kurt Koenen is audio production manager. Kinzie Morlin is my favorite podcast coordinator. Lisa J. Morrissette is operations manager and John Decker is Associate General Manager for Content. This programing is made possible in part by the KB's Explore Content Fun. I love saying that because it reminds me of Sesame Street. You'll stay safe out there.