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Politics

A Cat Named (N-Word)

We thought this was a good name because she was a good cat. There were few African Americans in Alice, Texas in 1955. We, and they, called themselves & ldquo;colored & rdquo; in those days. &

And in any case, I never associated the cat's name as having anything to do with them. That's why it was a mystery to me, that every time company came over, my grandmother would furtively take us aside and admonish us to call the cat & ldquo;Blackie & rdquo;. Nana would purse her lips and hold us firmly by our upper arm, and whisper & ldquo;Remember, the cat's name is Blackie & hellip;.Blackie & hellip;now don't you forget. & rdquo;

That added stress to each visit from the neighbors, or friends from the next town over, or the Presbyterian minister, or an occasional elementary teacher from school. One thing puzzled me though & hellip; I was pretty sure the neighbors knew what the cat's real name was because each evening when the cats were fed, my grandfather would stand on the back porch and yell & rdquo;Kiiiiiiiiiii & hellip; & hellip;Kiiiiiiii & rdquo;. That was for the general pack of felines. His favorite cat he would single out with & rdquo; HEEERE Nigger, Nigger. & rdquo; &

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Years later, as I was moving to New York City to pursue a career in the film industry, I remember my Grandmother's admonishment. & ldquo;Now honey, remember & hellip;if you are on an elevator and a black man gets in & hellip; you get out! & rdquo; Of course, by that age, I knew the power of bigotry, and like Sen. Barack Obama, I cringed, but I forced myself to remember that she was giving me advice based on her conditioning and prejudice .

And just last month I had to endure Sen. Hillary Clinton's & "red phone ad" in Texas. (Note to voting public -- she did not run this ad in Ohio hmm & hellip;I wonder why?????) Let's see. You take a white Texan (82 % of the Texas population) & hellip; you subliminally show sleeping children -- apparently white -- and a door slowly opening & hellip; who do they want to see & hellip; a white mother figure or a tall black man (i.e. & ldquo;the boogeyman & rdquo;) creeping into the room.

I think Obama's courageous speech was absolutely riveting. His beloved grandmother was racist & hellip; so was mine, so were many others. But like blacks and whites of previous generations, they came to their conditioning and opinions based on intolerance, fear, and tradition. For many whites, maintaining the status quo and keeping the racial myths alive worked best. For blacks & hellip; repression, fear and anger were the result. How could a people not fight back? Are these CNN and Fox neophytes qualified to ask if Rev. Jeremiah Wright has a right to his anger? You tell me what kind of man of his generation could turn his back on his history and be authentic?

Come on & hellip; just for a few moments & hellip; set aside time-honored bias, open your eyes and mind and walk in his shoes for a bit.

I was a John Edwards fan and I had my concerns about Obama & hellip; none of them related to his being half-black and half-white. I just didn't know enough about him, and I was aware that superb speakers do not always make superb leaders. But his speech on Tuesday brought me to the understanding that this is the man America has been waiting for. His courage to confront this & ldquo;sensitive & rdquo; issue (CNN's words, not mine), his intelligence to emphatically disagree with, but not disown, his pastor, his bridge-building ethnicity, and his conviction, that together, we can recover a proud and just America, has placed me fully in his camp and I hope you will join me in making sure he is the next President of our United States.

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-Citizen Voices blogger Candace Suerstedt is a filmmaker and a mother of three who lives in Coronado.