At Poseidon Project in Bay Park, it looked like a typical night out — drinks poured and conversations flowed. But inside the small bar, the topic people are discussing is anything but typical.
About 50 people packed in Wednesday evening for “Death Over Drafts,” a modern twist on traditional death cafes designed to spark open conversations about end-of-life issues.
“Raise your hand if you know what medical aid in dying is?” asked Christa Folkers, program director for Autonomy Health. “Because the first question that we get when we see people in our life is 'what? That’s legal in California?'”
The event was hosted by Autonomy Health, a medical practice that helps patients navigate end-of-life decisions. Folkers said the goal is to make these conversations feel more approachable by moving them into more familiar, social spaces.
“People who might be a little bit intimidated about going to something that is at a community center and are more comfortable in a casual bar atmosphere,” Folkers said.
The setting is also meant to attract younger participants.
“We knew that by offering an event that was at a bar with alcohol might appeal to the younger generation who really seems more curious than they ever have,” she said.
That curiosity drew in 26-year-old Paul Ammons.
“I believe there’s more people in my generation that are finding interest in these conversations," Ammons said. "But coming to places like a brewery, where we might hang out, it just makes the conversation easier.”
Part of that shift is tied to how rarely people talk about death in everyday life, he said.
“I do think that death feels closed off from a lot of our regular lives that we live,” Ammons said. “It’s often trapped in places like, let’s see, mortuaries or churches, mosques, temples, religious institutions.”
Attendees asked questions about the legality of medical aid in dying: who signs a death certificate, which patients qualify, and how the process works. Organizers said the questions reflected both curiosity and uncertainty around a topic many people rarely discuss openly.
“I would love to take part in those conversations with people my age, people like my parents, who are not having these conversations and see what does it mean to take control of our death,” Ammons said.
Organizers said that the goal is to normalize talking about death and dying by discussing an uncomfortable topic in a more comfortable setting. They are planning the next event in North County in July.
