'Courageous Aging' Author To Speak At Saturday Expo

THIS IS KPBS MIDDAY EDITION . I AM MAUREEN CAVANAUGH. EVERY TIME YOU HAVE A BIRTHDAY, THE CARDS SEEM TO GET WORSE AND WORSE . BIRTHDAY CARDS EXCEL IN ADVANCING THE WORST STEREOTYPES OF AGING. WE CAN LAUGH ABOUT BEING OVER THE HILL, BUT THE FACT IS THE IDEA OF GETTING OLDER CAN BE FRIGHTENING AND DEPRESSING. THIS WEEKEND EIGHT SUCCESSFUL AGING EXPO IS BEING HELD AT THE DELMAR FAIRGROUNDS AND ONE OF THE SPEAKERS AS MY GUEST DOCTOR KEN DRUCK OFFICE OF COURAGEOUS AGING. YOUR BEST YEARS EVER REIMAGINED. WELCOME BACK.Reporter: THE NAME OF YOUR BOOK COURAGEOUS AGING DOESN'T IT APPLY THAT AGING IS SOMETHING TO BE AFRAID OF AND TAKING COURAGE?AS WITH EVERY SEASON OF LIFE WE HAVE TO SUMMON NEW FOUND COURAGE AND BRAVERY TO FACE INTO THE CHALLENGES BUT ALSO TO GET OUT IN FRONT AND PROACTIVELY CREATE OPPORTUNITIES FOR THAT SEASON OF LIFE. AS WE GET OLDER WE HAVE THIS RICHNESS OF EXPERIENCE. WE HAVE GREATER CONFIDENCE, WE HAVE CONNECTIONS. WE HAVE A NETWORK IN THE WORLD. WE HAVE ALL THESE BENEFITS AND THIS WISDOM HOPEFULLY THAT WE GET TO APPLY TO OUR LIVES SO THE OPPORTUNITIES ARE LIMITLESS. YET WE LIVE IN A CULTURE THAT FEARS DEATH AND THERE IS DREAD AND FEAR ALL AROUND US AND THOSE MESSAGES ARE EMBEDDED IN OUR CULTURE IN EVERY SECTOR.Reporter: PEOPLE WHO ARE UPBEAT ABOUT AGING, SOMETIMES SAY THINGS LIKE 50 IS THE NEW 30 OR 60 IS THE NEW 40. FROM YOUR ASSESSMENT OF HOW PEOPLE AGE THESE DAYS IS THERE ANY TRUTH TO THESE IDEAS?60 IS 60. 50 IS 50. WE ARE WHERE WE ARE ON THE TIMELINE AND IT IS HOW WE FRAME IT. COW WE LOOK AT IT. SOME PEOPLE LOOK AT 60 AND THEY SAY THAT IS IRRELEVANT. DON'T ASK ME HOW OLD I AM. ASKED ME WHAT THE CUTTING EDGES IN MY LIFE RIGHT NOW. WHAT I AM MORE EXCITED ABOUT. OR WHAT IS WAYNE MOST HEAVILY ON MY HEART. WHAT ARE THE CHALLENGES I AM BASING AT 60, BUT DON'T PUT ME IN A BOX AND I THINK WE ALL FEAR THAT SOMEBODY SAYS HOW OLD ARE YOU? WHETHER WE ARE TURNING 40 OR 50 OR 60 BECAUSE AGING IS NOT AN ISSUE FOR SOMEBODY WHO IS 65. IT IS LIKE OKAY. NOW I AM IN THE CLUB. AGING IS AN ISSUE ALL ALONG THE WAY. THERE ARE PEOPLE WHO ARE JUST AS TERRIFIED AND SELF-CONSCIOUS TURNING 30 AS THEY ARE TURNING 70.Reporter: THE WAY SOCIETY THINKS ABOUT AGING AND OLDER PEOPLE -- THAT INFLUENCES THE WAY PEOPLE INDIVIDUALLY FEEL ABOUT GETTING OLDER. DOESN'T?ABSOLUTELY. WE INTERNALIZE . IF WE OBSESS ABOUT WHAT WE HAVE LOST RATHER THAN GRIEVE THOSE LOSSES AND MOVE THROUGH THEM, TO GREET OUR CURRENT SELF OR THE SELF THAT IS HERE TODAY, THE OLDER VERSION OF US, WHICH ALSO IN MANY CASES HAPPENS TO BE THE BETTER VERSION OF US. A LOT OF PEOPLE SAID I WOULD NOT GO BACK TO BE 30 OR 40. THAT PERSON DID NOT KNOW WHAT HE WAS DOING. SO IT IS IMPORTANT THAT WHEN WE LOOK IN THE MIRROR, WE LEARN HOW TO HAVE THAT MIRROR TALK AND WE LISTEN TO SEE AM I ADMONISHING MYSELF? AM I BEATING MYSELF UP? AND I JUDGING MYSELF PARTIALLY BECAUSE SOCIETY WANTS ME TO BE FOREVER YOUNG? OR AM I EMBRACING MYSELF? GREETING MY OLDER SOUTH, ENCOURAGING MYSELF AND CREATING A VISION FOR MY BEST POSSIBLE FUTURE?Reporter: IN YOUR BOOK COURAGEOUS AGING WHAT DO YOU FIND ARE SOME OF THE REALLY COMMON MISCONCEPTIONS ABOUT GETTING OLDER?THE FIRST MISCONCEPTION IS THAT WE ARE ON THE BACK NINE OF LIFE. THAT WE ARE IN A MOTIVE DECLINE. I TURNED 68 THIS YEAR. I WILL TELL YOU THAT I HAVE NEVER BEEN A MORE CREATIVE PHASE OF LIFE. I HAVE NEVER BEEN MORE CONFIDENT AND SETTLED. BASED ON YEARS OF EXPERIENCE, EVEN WITH ALL THE THINGS THAT ARE HAPPENING THAT ALL OF US ARE BEING CHALLENGED TO PROCESS, THE THINGS THAT ARE HAPPENING IN THE WORLD AROUND US WHETHER THEY ARE NATURAL DISASTERS OR CATASTROPHIC INCIDENTS LIKE THE ONE RECENTLY IN LAS VEGAS. WE HAVE BEEN THROUGH SEASONS OF THESE THINGS. HOPEFULLY WE HAVE NOT BECOME IN DIFFERENT OR DESENSITIZED. HOPEFULLY WE KNOW WHAT TO DO, AND HOW TO GO ABOUT IT. SO THAT WE ARE PAYING THE GOOD AND ALL THE THINGS THAT WE FEEL OUR PRIVILEGE IN OUR LIVES, ALL THE BLESSINGS AND GIFTS, ALL THE THINGS WE HAVE BEEN ABLE TO OBTAIN. WE ARE PAYING THE GOOD FORWARD BECAUSE GETTING YOUR ACT TOGETHER AS A 50 OR 60 OR 70 YEAR OLD IS NOT ONLY ABOUT YOU. IT IS ABOUT CREATING A LEVEL OF SOCIAL RESPONSIBILITY SO THAT WE ARE PAYING THE GOOD FORWARD EVEN IF WE ARE NOT GOING TO BE HERE TO STAND IN THE SHADE OF THAT TREE WE PLANTEDReporter: IN THE SECOND CHAPTER OF YOUR BOOK YOU ASK PEOPLE TO GIVE THEMSELVES AN AGING SELF AUDIT. WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?THE FIRST STEP IN ANY INQUIRY IN OUR LIVES, ANY ATTEMPT TO BECOME MORE REFLECTIVE, MORE AWARE, MORE AWAKE, MORE PRESENT AND MORE RESPONSIBLE IS TO TAKE INVENTORY, TO LOOK AT OURSELVES -- THAT IS WHAT I CREATED THE SELF AUDIT. IT GIVES EVERY READER AN OPPORTUNITY TO REALLY LOOK AT HOW AM I DOING WITH THIS ISSUE OF AGING? I AM ON THIS TIMELINE AND THINGS ARE HAPPENING AROUND ME. IT MAY BE A GRANDPARENTS DIES OR A PARENT OR A SPOUSE OR SOMEBODY IS DIAGNOSED WITH A LIFE-THREATENING ILLNESS OR I AM ON THE DOWNSIDE OF MY CAREER -- THOSE ARE THE TIMES TO REALLY TAKE A CLOSE LOOK INSIDE AND NOT EVEN TO WAIT FOR A CRISIS BUT TO BE PROACTIVE AND GET AHEAD OF THE PAIN CURVE OR THE FEAR CURVE OR THE DREAD CURVE BY LOOKING NOW AND DECIDING, HERE IS THE ATTITUDE I AM GOING TO ADOPT ABOUT GETTING OLDER. I AM NOT GOING TO PUT MYSELF THROUGH HELL. I AM GOING TO CREATE A BEAUTIFUL VISION FOR A VIBRANT FUTURE AND I WILL LIVE INTO IT.Reporter: YOU ALSO TALK ABOUT THINKING ABOUT THE MARK YOU WANT TO LEAVE ON THE WORLD. I THINK THAT IDEA IS RATHER TERRIFYING FOR PEOPLE TO CONSIDER. CAN YOU SUGGEST PEOPLE GO ABOUT THAT?IT IS TERRIFYING. THERE IS NO MAGIC PILL TO TAKE THAT WILL GET YOU OVER THE FEAR OF THE UNKNOWN. GET TO OVER THE FEAR OF WHAT HAPPENS WHEN OR AS I GET OLDER. THOSE ARE NATURAL, NORMAL FEARS AND WE NEED TO PROCESS THEM. WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT THEM. WE NEED TO GET THE SUPPORT WE NEED AS THINGS CHANGE IN OUR LIVES. ULTIMATELY, WE WANT TO LEAVE A LEGACY OF LOVE -- NOT OF CHAOS. THAT MEANS -- ONE OF THE PROJECTS FOR ME THIS YEAR WAS UNCLUTTERING MY HOUSE AND MY STORAGE. BECAUSE IF ANYTHING EVER HAPPENED TO ME, GUESS WHO -- MY FIANCÉ AND MY DAUGHTER WOULD BE LEFT WITH MONTHS OF UNCLUTTERING AND SORTING THROUGH THINGS AND DECIDING WHAT TO KEEP. GETTING OUR HOUSE IN ORDER HAPPENS ON A VERY PRACTICAL LEVEL, UNCLUTTERING OUR LIVES. IT HAPPENS ON A FINANCIAL, LEGAL LEVEL AND ON AN EMOTIONAL AND SPIRITUAL LEVEL WITH MAKING PEACE WITH LIFE ON LIFE'S TURNS. THIS IS THE WAY OF LIFE AND I NEED TO FACE INTO IT RATHER THAN AVOID IT. OTHERWISE I WILL GO KICKING AND SCREAMING INTO MY LATER YEARS.Reporter: I HAVE BEEN SPEAKING WITH DOCTOR KEN DRUCK AUTHOR OF COURAGEOUS AGING, YOUR BEST YEARS EVER REIMAGINED. THE SUCCESSFUL AGING IS THIS SATURDAY AT THE DELMAR FAIRGROUNDS. IS SO MUCH.THANK YOU SO MUCH. SO GOOD TO SEE YOU AGAIN.